By Sofie Chan
Staff Writer
Valentine’s Day makes me miss something I’ve never had. Though I find companionship with my friends, I am also afraid to lose out on the high school dating scene. It seems that many teens are stuck in a “now” mindset and prioritize short term relationships over long lasting, emotionally intimate partnerships.
In high school, teens feel pressured to be in a relationship because it seems like everyone is dating. However, the number of couples is actually very small, since Pew Research Center found that only about 35% of high school students have experienced romance. As such, it makes no sense that there is a large expectation to date.
While 35% is close to a third of our school, couples tend to be more visible, inflating the societal expectation to date in high school and encouraging teens to rush into a relationship.
This pressure and fear of missing out can be especially damaging for those who may not be mature enough for romantic commitment.
To paraphrase Cosmopolitan, rushing creates romanticized expectations, which can make people overlook red flags and form a superficial relationship. Additionally, a study done by The Journal of Adolescent Research found that only two percent of high school couples actually last.
For those who haven’t found partners, a lack of prospects can contribute to feelings of inadequacy, negative self-image and anxiety. A fixation on finding a partner is unhealthy, and single teens tend to look at romantic relationships in an idealistic light without considering the effort it takes to maintain one’s status as a couple.
It’s important for teens to remember that not all strong partnerships come from dating. Other kinds of relationships are often overlooked because people are so fixated on romance. Receiving helpful mentorship, seeing a friend put in the effort to make your life less stressful and being told you are appreciated can be just as special as dating.
My own circle of friends display our platonic love by exchanging gifts, sharing words of encouragement and spending quality time with each other; things that can also be found in romantic relationships. Making meaningful friendships provides the security and feeling of belonging that many couples experience, just without the expectation to be dating. Take it from me, obsessing over dating isn’t going to get you anywhere, and rushing head-first into your first relationship isn’t necessary to truly experience love. A strong bond will ultimately benefit you in the long run. There are people who love you already, whether it be your family, friends or teachers. So this Valentine’s Day, I encourage you—single or not—to look beyond superficiality and celebrate with all your loved ones.