There’s this one test called International Personality Item Pool that gives you a bunch of numbers, ranging from 1-100 about certain aspects of your personality. I got results like 92 for anger and 24 for gregariousness. I can’t argue with those results, but only one number stood out to me. Adventurousness: 1.
Was this quiz wrong? Of the 100 numbers it could have given me, did I really deserve the lowest score? I calculate every decision and hiss at spontaneity. I can’t even be sure of my order at Ajisen until my sister tells me to just hurry up already, and I freak out when a waiter tells me they ran out of something, because I didn’t plan for that to happen. Maybe I really did deserve a 1.
I wish I was capable of taking that leap, capable of not having to compute my decisions to just do something. I’ve been actively telling myself to not be so uptight, that everything will be okay. What’s the worst that can happen anyway?
I went to Yosemite just a few weeks ago, and it was the perfect place to try to be a little more adventurous. We were in the woods for hours at a time. If people had to pee, they either held it or used facilitrees—a cute term for pissing in the woods. Needless to say, I held it every time. I was afraid that I’d tinkle on my shoes, which in fact, weren’t even mine. Even when our instructors taught us how to properly relieve ourselves in the woods without dirtying our shoes, I was too scared. UTIs aren’t that bad, right?
Plus, I wasn’t about to pull my pants down when I was a short distance away from 14 other hikers. What if people saw? My little butt cheeks and chamber of secrets would be out in the open, and this moment would be ingrained into my memory, and worse, their memories, forever.
But then, I remembered Adventure: 1. To most, peeing in the woods isn’t an adventure at all, but recall that I won’t even take the slightest chance with ramen. So I just did it. I was nervously laughing the entire time, but I did it. I was so proud of myself, I ran back and told Rachel, “I did it!” with a giant smile on my face. I also got to try other adventurous things, from squeezing through pitch black spider caves to cross country skiing, but peeing in the woods is like a milestone for my life. I think my adventure score is a solid 4 now.
Someday, after I learn to order ramen without having to plan for half an hour, I’ll be jetpacking over Niagara Falls. I don’t like the Niagara; I can’t swim and I don’t want to die by crashing down 100 feet into the rocks and drowning. But I’ll be jetpacking over the Niagara anyway.