Six years ago, a second grader named Stanley arrived at my house from the LAX airport, about ready to burst into tears. This was my first encounter with a homestay student, commonly called parachute kids in the media.
Since then, my family has hosted more than four homestays, students who are sent to the U.S. in search of education or a better quality of life while their parents conduct business in their home nation.
As I essentially grew up with students like Stanley, who made trips back and forth between the U.S. and mainland China during vacations, I witnessed the development of behaviors trending amongst children without parental guidance.
I noticed that the longer Stanley stayed away from his mother, the more aggressive and reclusive he became. He embraced technology as a way to escape the ever-looming absence of loved ones. In reality, these isolated individuals go through a lonely upbringing in a country an ocean apart from where they were born.
“I find that many of the younger students seek attention because of the fractured environment they grew up in,” one female host student said. “It may also be because they’re lonelier than the average person, as they’re kept away from immediate family.”
For a majority of young people earning an education overseas, there is a desperate tendency to stick with others in the same situation, which sometimes adds to their greater social isolation.
On March 30, a group of parachute kids allegedly stripped and tortured another homestay girl in a Rowland Heights park. This prompted media commentary on the world of children devoid of adults, with The Los Angeles Times showcasing the event as a dangerous display of lack of parental supervision.
Though such incidents have painted homestay students in a bad light, at the core of these issues is not a deliberate vindictive streak, but a clear message that vital chapters in the childhood and development of parachute kids are missing. Parents and guardians, especially across seas, have an obligation to nurture their children or wards until they can carry responsibilities for themselves.
The hardest part of my journey with these people has honestly not been the fees or lack of privacy or income worries, but having to watch children grow up without their parents or guardians around. The situation varies from person to person, but in the end, whether or not a child in another country succeeds is influenced by their environment and those who care for them.
“I thought that I was the only one that was here like this,” one male homestay student said. “But I don’t regret it at all now, because people like my first counselor here, who spoke hand language with me, and family members who I keep in contact with, guide me through anything.”
Any person, native or not, can reach out to those who lack experience of our language and customs to make them feel a little at home, even though it’s an ocean away.